I’m going to write…

buy modafinil uk forum So, I was going to blog my motherhood journey. I was going to write whether it made sense or anyone read it. I didn’t care. I was going to write, because then at least in a few years I could look back and remember all the little things I had forgotten. I was going to memorialise the good, the bad and the ugly of being a new Mum.

buy prednisone 10mg online I was an idiot.

Seroquel overdose I like to think in general I’ve been quite down to earth and honest with myself about what to expect from myself once becoming a new Mum. I wasn’t going to expect perfection, or to get made up or even showered every day. I wasn’t going to expect crafting and breastfeeding and daily educational fun activities. I wasn’t going to expect my baby to have the perfect routine and be happy all the time.

My goals were as follows –

1. Ensure baby is fed and clothed successfully each day

2. Ensure that I was clothed in at least pjs and managed to eat at least one semi-meal per day (graze snack pots count as a meal)

3. Try to make one Mum friend

That was it my goals. Oh and WRITE ABOUT BEING A NEW MUM!

What on Earth was I thinking? Little Squish is now 5 months old (ish) and this is the first time I’ve even had chance to have a fully formed thought about writing a post never mind doing it. It’s not just the constant attention a baby needs, even with a “good” baby. It’s the fact that you are totally fried, Mum brain is a real thing, the exhaustion is nothing like you’ve ever dealt with before and to be honest I now think those women who do manage to blog and Instagram and blog and whatever the fuck else is going on in the world of social media are either robots, high on uppers or simply a different breed of human to me. Because, whilst as a mum you’re never supposed to say this – I cannot do it all. I just can’t.

But I really want to try. So I’m going to try. I may not get onto my instagram or my Twitter or anything else but I’m going to try.

Wish me luck!

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Personal Reading Challenge 2017

Personal Reading Challenge 2017

For 2017 I have set myself a personal challenge to read a book a week or 52 books before the end of the year!

British Book Challenge 2017

This is also linked in with me taking part in the British Book Challenge 2017. Which is being hosted by Chelley Toy at Tales of Yesterday Book Blog.

Tales of Yesterday

In this post i am going to link to each of the 52 books i have read and reviewed, another way to make sure i do it!!!

  1. Mrs Dalloway by Virginia Woolf
    • For The Fat Girl’s review click here
    • For Goodreads reviews click here
  2. Escape by Kate Cann
    • For The Fat Girl’s review click here
    • For Goodreads reviews click here
  3. Gilded Cage by Vic James
    • For The Fat Girl’s review click here
    • For Goodreads reviews click here
  4. Mind Your Head by Juno Dawson
    • For The Fat Girl’s review click here
    • For Goodreads reviews click here
  5. After You by Jojo Moyes
    • The Fat Girl’s review to come shortly
    • For Goodreads reviews click here
  6. A Monster Calls by Patrick Ness
    • The Fat Girl’s review to come shortly
    • For Goodreads reviews click here
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Assumptions. Make an…

This weekend I bit the bullet and joined my local gym, I got a discount due to being a Slimming World member for the gym, swim and classes. But, as I explained to the very nice man – I have no intention of using the gym. I have nothing against them I just personally would rather put nails in my eyes.

What I planned on doing was swimming two mornings a week and doing Pilates at least once a week, I enjoy this. I love swimming and Pilates is exercise which is strangely fun and relaxing. Weird I know?!

But when I went for my induction there were a lot of assumptions being made. Lots of phrases starting with;

“as a slimming world member you will need to be doing…”

“to lose that weight you need to do…”

“as a woman your size you will obviously want to be doing…”

Now fair enough, here I am joining a gym – in January – on the slimming world membership – they are bound to assume it’s because I want to lose weight and “drop the pounds quick”. And yet, when I explained that actually I’m not here for high intensity, sweaty and painful workouts I am here to do some exercise which I will enjoy and will help me increase my fitness levels. I own two beagles and work in a college with a lot of stairs, I am not unfit although apparently my size 18/20 body told them otherwise – and they said so. (To be honest someone guessing my dress size just added to my frustration!)

The point of all of this is for me to be a happier me! Cheesy cliches are encouraged today! Yea I may be bigger than what is expected of me, but I am finally okay with that. What I want to do is a bit of swimming, giggling in Pilates, improve my current fitness levels and have healthier eating habits. And that’s all- OKAY!?

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Triggers

So… I haven’t posted in a while and I think that it is because I have been naughty. Not in the way that I am on a diet and I can’t eat certain things because they are fattening and bad and fattening is ugly and horrible. But in the way that I want to change, I want to be more myself, more happy.

I am now realising that I have some pretty serious self-destruct triggers and if I want to change anything there is no point worrying about my weight and my food intake or number of steps and dress size. What I need to worry about are those triggers.

For the past few weeks I have eaten everything in sight, done absolutely minimum movement, gotten spotty and grumpy and tired. Enough. No more.

SO my first trigger I have figured out is food related. But not because food is evil! Whenever I drink fizzy drinks I get lazy, I stop getting up to refresh water and just pour it from the bottle. I get bloated and sickly so I don’t want to move, or cook, or make an effort with anything. To stop feeling crappy and bloated and not want to make an effort I now need to cut out the fizzy drinks.

To make sure I do I’ve finally succumbed and got myself a gym membership – not that I will be using the gym. Horrible place. But I have committed myself to swimming two mornings a week before work, a pilates class once a week and i am going to run my dogs ragged. I’ve put it in my diary and told my mum and everything. Promise.

MOTIVATION!

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New Years Resolutions

I don’t normally make New Years Resolutions as I know that they will be out of the window by midday on the 3rd January, maybe the 5th if I am feeling saintly…

But this year I have decided to make a change for several reasons, so my resolutions are –

  1. To change my eating habits; my goal is to lose weight to become more comfortable with my body, not because I am too fat and unhappy. I have joined Slimmng World where I will be changing how I eat, not cutting out and becoming a coconut water addict, but focussing on eating healthier and better foods for me.
  2. I am aiming to become more active, walk the dogs a little bit further and start using my dusty treadmill a little more often.
  3. To make more of an effort to get up off the sofa and spend quality time with my husband, get out and enjoy our lives.

These resolutions encompass a lot more details but basically they all add up to becoming more comfortable in myself and happier in my life.

Ok enough corny, i’m off to move the celebrations so that they stop calling to me…

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