So I’ve been a bit of a ghost recently and that’s because of some really great news! I’m pregnant! 12 weeks and 5 days to be specific and that’s why I’ve been so quiet recently.

TFG's Bean

Firstly, I’ve been so knackered its unbelievable! I mean seriously! I don’t think I’ve slept this much since I was a kid! You think you know what to expect from pregnancy when you read the books and the blogs and talk to friends. Let me tell you, no you don’t! There is no possible way to know what pregnancy is going to feel like for you, but don’t be scared just keep doing your best to look after yourself and most importantly – ASK QUESTIONS!

I’ve also been struggling to keep my mouth shut and not scream it from the rooftops. I really am useless at keeping secrets like this, other people’s sure! But not mine. The thing is, as much as I wanted to tell everyone, I was terrified to do so after I lost a pregnancy last year quite early on. It’s like someone was holding a pillow over me, I was fighting to be strong and happy and excited but I was stifled and scared. It’s like my own emotions and hormones were stopping me from being excited and doing what I wanted to – shouting it from the rooftops.

This feeling of numbness and almost pressure and detachment from the excitement I wanted to feel was a bit scary. Was this normal? Do other people feel like this? Will it pass? Is there something wrong with me?

I think these feelings are pretty normal from people I’ve spoken to and other stories I’ve read, the problem comes when it becomes too much to cope with. When you feel down and horrible all the time, this is time to definitely get help. Luckily I just feel numb and not bad about anything, I can still get excited and coo over things I just wish it didn’t feel so unreal!

British Book Challenge 2017ANYWAY! So that’s my big news, I’m hoping that now I’ve hit the second trimester I’m going to have a bit more energy and can get back on track with my personal reading challenge, the British Books Challenge and hopefully get back to blogging more often!

Lucy At Home

10 Replies to “Sooo big news…”

  1. Ahh congratulations!! I felt this way in my second pregnancy, I was convinced there was no way I could be lucky enough to have 2 children and my sigh of relief was audible when I first saw our baby on the screen at the 12 week scan. I hope you are getting lots of rest and I look forward to hearing more about your pregnancy journey xx #BlogCrush

    1. Rest is almost mandatory lol! I keep falling asleep all over the place without meaning to! Thanks for the comment =D

  2. Wow this is so exciting! Congratulations! You’re right – the tiredness of pregnancy is on a whole new level! Haha.

    I’m sorry that you’re struggling a bit with your emotions at the moment. I think pregnancy can do that at the best of times, even without having the sadness of losing a baby last year. I know I felt detached from my pregnancy for ages – I just couldn’t compute that I was actually going to be getting a real life baby human at the end of it all! It all seemed too surreal. I thought when it would feel more real once I’d seen the baby on the scan, but even that didn’t help.

    In the end, it was listening to the baby’s heartbeat at my 17wk midwife appointment that suddenly brought it all to life for me. Everyone is different and reacts in different ways. So I think just give it time – there’s no special way that you’re “supposed to” feel, it’s just coming to terms with it all in your own way.

    But congratulations and I look forward to hearing some more pregnancy-related updates! #blogcrush

    1. Glad to know its not just me! I do have moments of being happy and excited but the definite overwhelming feeling is numbness and a bit down and disbelief. I really hope the happy kicks in soon! I see people around me getting excited and I feel awkward that I can’t join in without having to fake it. Got my 20wk scan coming up so hopefully I will have felt movement and seeing baby a bit bigger will help. Also thanks for the congratulations and comment!

  3. Congratulations! I’m very excited for you! I am currently suspecting I may be pregnant, myself, and none of my family members can keep it a secret. We didn’t take a test yet! But, I’m late and I’m never late. I look forward to reading your updates on pregnancy! #blogcrush

    1. Ah exciting! How have you not taken a test yet? Mind you I’m about as patient as a tantrum throwing toddler so I wouldn’t be able to wait. Hope everything goes well for you!

  4. Congratulations, that is wonderful news 🙂

    I hope pregnancy is easy on you. I had a great pregnancy, I could have been on the show ‘I didn’t know I was pregnant’ for all the symptoms I got (or didn’t get. Not even morning sickness!), then had an amazing straight forward C-Section at end.

    1. Wow that sounds lovely glad it all went well! I’m already really struggling but know its nowhere near as bad as some women have it. I’m sure it will be more than worth it in the end though.

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