So… I haven’t posted in a while and I think that it is because I have been naughty. Not in the way that I am on a diet and I can’t eat certain things because they are fattening and bad and fattening is ugly and horrible. But in the way that I want to change, I want to be more myself, more happy.

I am now realising that I have some pretty serious self-destruct triggers and if I want to change anything there is no point worrying about my weight and my food intake or number of steps and dress size. What I need to worry about are those triggers.

For the past few weeks I have eaten everything in sight, done absolutely minimum movement, gotten spotty and grumpy and tired. Enough. No more.

SO my first trigger I have figured out is food related. But not because food is evil! Whenever I drink fizzy drinks I get lazy, I stop getting up to refresh water and just pour it from the bottle. I get bloated and sickly so I don’t want to move, or cook, or make an effort with anything. To stop feeling crappy and bloated and not want to make an effort I now need to cut out the fizzy drinks.

To make sure I do I’ve finally succumbed and got myself a gym membership – not that I will be using the gym. Horrible place. But I have committed myself to swimming two mornings a week before work, a pilates class once a week and i am going to run my dogs ragged. I’ve put it in my diary and told my mum and everything. Promise.


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